Tress Stress – The Big Chop

Tomorrow I am cutting my hair.

Long hair today, just shy of shoulder length tomorrow.

This may not seem like a big deal to you, but I have not shorn my locks since a fateful day 10 years ago (yes, ten years ago), when I succumbed to a trend and cut it all off. Short. Boy-short. It was not elfin-like and I did not look like Carey Mulligan or Winona Ryder, or any other cropped-crop pixie. Thankfully I was oblivious to this fact, and because it was a trend, was surrounded by other equally misinformed girls.

 But as the years passed and I looked back on the photographic evidence, I saw the wood for the trees, or rather the crop for the crap, as it were. And I vowed to never go short ever, ever again.

 That was a long time ago. Since then I have become a trim maniac: “Not more than an inch, please!” I say, with large, shiny eyes and white knuckles. You would think that with this all this cautious trimming I’d be able to sit on my hair by now, but, to add insult to injury, my hair is determined to grow at a snail’s pace. People like to say “Oh, don’t worry, it’ll grow back”. It makes me want to brooklax their Biscuit Mill Bloody Mary’s.

Now you see why tomorrow is a Big Day for me and my hair.

 In this month’s Elle, Dion Chang described the complex bond that binds hairdresser and client perfectly when he called it an ‘intimate relationship’. A most intimate relationship. Many people stay with the same stylist for years, and are beside themselves when forced to move. Intensive research ensues and second and third opinions are then sourced…

 Lourens of The Hairdresser, Knysna, cut my hair from primary school right through to the end of university. During term time I would snip away at my split ends and wait patiently for vac so that he could tend to my locks personally. And so, it is to Lourens that I entrust my tresses tomorrow. An institution in Knysna, Lo, as he is affectionately called by those in the know, has been keeping the damsels of Knysna chic for nearly two decades. Surely the keeper of many a skandaal, Lo is also edgy as all get out, and has great taste and an amazing laugh.

 And so I take the plunge, with the knowledge that Lourens knows my hair and knows me, too. Shoulder length hair is a big trend right now, with celebrities all over Hollywood opting for different looks: a choppy Alexa Chung tangle or a wavy Drew Barrymore bounce? A sleek Gwyneth Paltrow bob or a chic shag like Freja Beha Erichsen?

My inspiration is this Liv Tyler tousle:

 Wish me luck!


3 responses to “Tress Stress – The Big Chop

  1. Oh good luck – i cant wait for pics, no doubt it will look great, but don’t think that it is magically going thicken…your hair is still going to be so thin that you can pin it up ‘with one bobby pin!’…darn!

    • Haha! I know, magic hair. It’s actually gotten quite unruly and thicker with age. I need at LEAST two or bobby pins to keep it in place 🙂

  2. p.s. i want Gwyneth hair!!!

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